Sunday, June 21, 2009
Friday, June 5, 2009
Baaaaaaaaaaston May 20
Reporting on the trip. Mostly just hilarity, shenanigans, and utter nonsense.
Day one:
-------------
5:30am Left Tucson, head to phx
7:10am Entered Phoenix (what do you mean by this is boring?...shhhh)
11:30am Arrived at phoenix airport.
Now I don't expect all of you to be whizzes at math, now do I expect you to thoroughly understand the expanse of phoenix. Let me break it down for you: it does not take over 4 hours to get from the edge of phoenix to the airport even on the rushiest of rush hour mornings. Apparently it DOES take over 4 hours when some jerk running from the police in his black SUV decides to drive the wrong way down the freeway and cause a horrible accident.
--------
Dear Hooligans,
Please drive into a brick wall instead of the wrong way down the freeway. It will have a similar impact and won't be so intrusive or harmful to others.
Kindly,
Mariah
-------- I digress
12:00pm Margaritas
1:45pm New flight took off - since we had missed our first one by over 2 hours
10:50pm Arrived in Boston
11:15pm Got in to the smelliest cab on the face of the Earth
11:40pm Ordered the crappiest, most expensive food we will ever eat in our entire lives.
12:10pm A piece of Sarena's filling came out
Last straw. Bed.
Day one:
-------------
5:30am Left Tucson, head to phx
7:10am Entered Phoenix (what do you mean by this is boring?...shhhh)
11:30am Arrived at phoenix airport.
Now I don't expect all of you to be whizzes at math, now do I expect you to thoroughly understand the expanse of phoenix. Let me break it down for you: it does not take over 4 hours to get from the edge of phoenix to the airport even on the rushiest of rush hour mornings. Apparently it DOES take over 4 hours when some jerk running from the police in his black SUV decides to drive the wrong way down the freeway and cause a horrible accident.
--------
Dear Hooligans,
Please drive into a brick wall instead of the wrong way down the freeway. It will have a similar impact and won't be so intrusive or harmful to others.
Kindly,
Mariah
-------- I digress
12:00pm Margaritas
1:45pm New flight took off - since we had missed our first one by over 2 hours
10:50pm Arrived in Boston
11:15pm Got in to the smelliest cab on the face of the Earth
11:40pm Ordered the crappiest, most expensive food we will ever eat in our entire lives.
12:10pm A piece of Sarena's filling came out
Last straw. Bed.
Wednesday, May 13, 2009
UA is superior to ASU
It's a fact. Here are just a few reasons why:
1) Students & faculty at ASU often display questionable behavior:
Exhibit A: http://www.thedailyshow.com/video/index.jhtml?videoId=227327&title=arizona-state-snubs-obama
all while University of Arizona researchers are finding cures for life threatening disease:
http://health.usnews.com/articles/health/healthday/2009/05/13/scorpion-anti-venom-speeds-childrens--recovery.html
2) Students at ASU make videos no one wants to watch
Exibit B:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wNQzrifEkGc
I'm embarrassed. I hope they are still in that desert. 5 minutes of my life I will never get back.
University of Arizona makes inspiring videos that people want to watch:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LlfnRsr6hU4
3) Arizona state University is ranked lower than University of Arizona in every legitimate ranking poll known to man.
4) Playboy says it all: http://www.playboyu.com/playboy-party-schools. Not only is UA ranked higher academically, but we're ranked higher as a party school. Wow two for two. Ouch ASU.
5) I went to University of Arizona.
There. Proven. Dispute settled.
1) Students & faculty at ASU often display questionable behavior:
Exhibit A: http://www.thedailyshow.com/video/index.jhtml?videoId=227327&title=arizona-state-snubs-obama
all while University of Arizona researchers are finding cures for life threatening disease:
http://health.usnews.com/articles/health/healthday/2009/05/13/scorpion-anti-venom-speeds-childrens--recovery.html
2) Students at ASU make videos no one wants to watch
Exibit B:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wNQzrifEkGc
I'm embarrassed. I hope they are still in that desert. 5 minutes of my life I will never get back.
University of Arizona makes inspiring videos that people want to watch:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LlfnRsr6hU4
3) Arizona state University is ranked lower than University of Arizona in every legitimate ranking poll known to man.
4) Playboy says it all: http://www.playboyu.com/playboy-party-schools. Not only is UA ranked higher academically, but we're ranked higher as a party school. Wow two for two. Ouch ASU.
5) I went to University of Arizona.
There. Proven. Dispute settled.
Friday, May 1, 2009
I'm practically an auto mechanic
I have a pie chart that proves it.
I spent a lot of effort trying to switch out my headlight which is burnt out.
1) I went to Auto Zone, grew impatient with the wait to receive computational product look up assistance, and left.
2) I went to a second auto zone, was assisted in finding the correct product, and - after a long wait and sun beaming into my retina - purchased the merch.
3) I came home, parked my car, popped the hood.
4) I manually lifted the hood to the sky to assess the situation.
5) I peered into the left headlight socket region.
6) I gently pulled on a piece of a dirty under-car contraption that did not move.
7) I reached far left with my left arm and upwards with my right arm and manually closed the hood.
No, my light was not magically changed in the above course of steps, but progress was made. Conclusions were developed. My right index finger and thumb had car remnants.
It's pretty official. I am a mechanic.
I spent a lot of effort trying to switch out my headlight which is burnt out.
1) I went to Auto Zone, grew impatient with the wait to receive computational product look up assistance, and left.
2) I went to a second auto zone, was assisted in finding the correct product, and - after a long wait and sun beaming into my retina - purchased the merch.
3) I came home, parked my car, popped the hood.
4) I manually lifted the hood to the sky to assess the situation.
5) I peered into the left headlight socket region.
6) I gently pulled on a piece of a dirty under-car contraption that did not move.
7) I reached far left with my left arm and upwards with my right arm and manually closed the hood.
No, my light was not magically changed in the above course of steps, but progress was made. Conclusions were developed. My right index finger and thumb had car remnants.
It's pretty official. I am a mechanic.
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